A Fine Line Between Chic & Naff
The conundrum on matchy-matchy names
When it comes to naming, cohesion is something many people naturally seek out. And while we don’t often see many out there mismatched sibling names in the wild, I think there’s two reasons for this. Firstly, over time, pairs and sibsets tend to develop a kind of nurtured synergy. Whether intentional or intuitive, names within a family usually settle into a shared rhythm, tone or style that just feels right together. To be fair, I don’t know if Arthur and Neo would ever get there but that leads me to my second point. It is rare to find parents disregard their entire direction and do a 180 into another galaxy.
Unlikely isn’t the same as ‘clashing’
Even when it’s an unlikely pairing much like the beloved Martha Stewart and Snoop Dogg duo (moment for Martha & Calvin because YES!) it can start to make sense simply because on paper it doesn’t slash shouldn’t. However, unlikely sibling names are very often within the same realm despite their degrees of separation.
Think Theodosia and Cassian. Unusual, yes but there’s a thread of drama, romance, and fantasy holding them together.
Or even Pierre and Aisling. One feels like a French art dealer, the other a Gaelic forest sprite but there’s an offbeat harmony between them. They don’t share a cultural root or a soundscape but they’re both soft, luminous and in time make perfect sense.
Sausage and Mustard of Naming
It makes me think of Nigel Slater’s What Goes With What from Appetite.
“Some flavours work together. Other's don't. You can't really argue with the theory that if you like something then it works, but to experiment with marrying flavours, in a trial and error situation like a mad scientist, will not only take forever but will probably lead to some really horrid meals.”
Now trialling different flavours together isn’t the same thing as working overtime at the baby factory but the sentiment rings true.
“Some flavours have a natural affinity for each other.”
Consider Cleo & Alba / Henry & Jack / Jaimee & Arlo — they just make sense.
You’ll notice none of those pairings have alliteration or matching prefix or suffixes. But to quote Slater one last time,
“it is simply that there is something intrinsically right about them.”
The Naming Tightrope
Enter the fine line balancing on cohesion and dare I say commercial. Once you start leaning into overt matching — alliteration, matching endings, mirrored soundscapes, the question of taste becomes a little more precarious. There’s nothing wrong with it per se but there can be a forced feeling or even a little packaged, family brand note.
I do think there is a trick though. Like the once never twice, unspoken give way rule of the roads, when it comes to naming I think twice is nice, three is a trap. And if you’re happy to be knee deep in that immovable pool of honey of your own choosing, then go for it. Lily, Logan, Lewis and Lena are adorable together but you’re committed. End of (to me anyway).
A$AP Rocky recently commented that it would definitely be another R name for him and Bad Gal Rhi Rhi which I totally did not see coming from them. I struggle to remove 3+ alliteration names from the Kardashians. But given that both parents are R names themselves (Rakim & Robyn), it feels only right that we get a full Kardashian-style Christmas card from them. The ultimate tribute to alliterative family naming.
And it also makes me wonder if two of undeniably the coolest people in existence if not history, can make alliteration family names cool? Honestly, when you factor me into the equation of cool with A$AP and Rihanna, well...we all know where I land on that spectrum. I don’t even make it near them. So, we all know what the answer is. They’re going to make it cool, whether I think so or not.
You can do cohesion without it being obvious and hey sometimes it can happen completely by chance, as what happened with my children. Odette and Wynn have double letters in them which is a very subtle, by chance thread. And that is my preference. A little invisible string aspect to pairing over matching.
Shared Notes
The loudest voice isn’t necessarily the one that makes the most sense. There are plenty ways to quietly align names which is my favoured path.
Tonal buddies — names that feels like they’re the same pace e.g. soft and airy versus crisp and strong.
Syllabic — one syllable dot names or languid three syllable heavy hitters. I love this approach in tying names together.
It’s a vibe — you all know I love a stylistic match if you’ve come from Instagram/TikTok (which you are - I mean how else do you get to this tiny corner of the internet without them?) Cottagecore to Playground Princess to Sandcastle Surfer. Names that match one another’s frequency get my seal of approval.
Mean well — names that share a meaning or have weight behind them. E.g. Sonya means wisdom and Emmett means truth which could make for a virtuous sibset.
Eras — timing is key. Vintage names, Y2K names even eighties bangers, it’s a nice way to draw cohesion from history rather than opting for Ollie, Oscar and Odin.
Yes, No, Maybe So
Look my main thing when it comes to naming a human being is considering said human being. Make sure it’s a choice given with consideration and care not clout or shock factor because it is always obvious when it’s the latter. It is for them, it isn’t about you. But here are some guidelines from me.
Matching letters — two is cute, three is set. You can switch lanes after two but once you hit three, you’re locked in.
Zoom out before you zone in — no Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. Note Parker and Posey as a sibset may have people shouting PIPER NO and TSUNAMI at you.
You’re creating a family, not running a franchise.
Repeat endings can be more miss than hit.
—ella, —ette, —o endings, you’ve been warned.
Near identical names can set you up for lifelong confusion. I mean my mother calls me Andrew from time to time. Andrew and Sonya aren’t close at all, so imagine Cara and Claire.
Don’t be afraid of breaking any and whatever rules you’ve adopted.
Remember timing can bring even the most unlikely pairings together. Although I won’t hold my breath on something like Beckham and Bartholomew. Even with the matching B.
If you love it, that’s what matters. I’m just an opinionated namer on the internet, what do I know?
